Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
