Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
