So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
