But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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