I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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