i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
