Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize
