So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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