Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
