i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
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