Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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