Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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