YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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