i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
