She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You ruined the universe
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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