I skipped work to stalk him.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
