Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
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