Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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