dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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