I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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