can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
