i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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