That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Randomize
