I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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