What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
