Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
