do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
