I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
