Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
