I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
