you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
