love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Randomize
