i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
