some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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