I skipped work to stalk him.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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