Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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