she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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