Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
