mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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