Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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