I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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