1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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