Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
