ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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