Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
