The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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