Capitaan dildo arrescate!
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
