i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I intend to get homeless drunk
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
