just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
