My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize